Volume 78: The C.F.O.B.
At a Glance: The CFOB (pronounced See-Fob by most) blur the lines between racial class and character class. They are a group of multiverse traveling Clowns that have bonded with nature (specifically Bees) in order to protect life in all its forms. C.F.O.B. stands for: Clowns full of Bees.
Appearance & Lifestyle: The CFOB, unapologetically, look like space clowns. Like all clowns their look can vary almost infinitely. But they do have some things in common. They all will keep their faces painted, almost constantly. They will only willingly show their true face to the people closest to them, and sometimes not even then. Their dress is equally as varying and elaborate. But most wear some form of “traditional” clown garb but with a futuristic flair. Big shoes, giant collars, flowers, wigs, gloves, and more.
The CFOB live lives of entertainment and service. Not just to people but to animals and nature as well. With people they love to evoke emotion. Happiness, sadness, introflection and more. In nature they are fierce protectors of forests, jungles, endangered species and more. All CFOB start with some makeup or disguise skill and 3 entertainment skills of their choice.
The CFOB blur the lines between race and class. Most look-like human clowns but they can also look like elves, halflings, gnomes, and even dwarves. Their origins are shrouded in mystery (on purpose and by themselves, we will explore some of it in the History section below) and many think they should simply be considered a very large group. However, the truth is they exist in such large numbers, and overall look so similar many consider them to be their own race.
Powers & Abilities: Another amazing thing the CFOB have is a vast array of powers and abilities. Too many to go over them all here (each will one day be represented by a separate character class; we will discuss some of them as examples below.) but they all do share some powers and abilities in common.
They all paint their faces. Depending on how they paint their face they receive some kind of bonus. This bonus could be anything from a skill stat boost to a protective spell. (Charts will be provided for this eventually) They also all gain some bonus from the type of garb they dress in.
Most notably they are all, quite literally, full of bees. They possess no internal organs or bones. These have been replaced with magically strengthened hives for the bees to live in. They have no blood, but instead bleed honey when they are cut or injured. Depending on their class the CFOB can use their bees and honey for varying and powerful magical abilities. Some can create swarms of deadly bees, or even swarms of bees that heal or cause fire or ice. Some can use their honey as a weapon, throwing it like super-hot lava or fashioning it into super hard honey resin weapons.
They live in symbiosis with the bees. The clowns provide a home for them and protect them. In exchange the bees provide the clowns with magic and other abilities. When a CFOB is injured the bees will begin to swarm around the injury, mending it and healing them. An injured CFOB will begin to regenerate the round after being attacked. CFOB regenerate 1d4+1 hp per round upon being injured until they are healed. This regeneration lasts for 10 rounds + 2 rounds per level of CFOB. After this the number of bees left in the CFOB will become critical and regeneration will not be possible again for 24 hours.
Perhaps the most amazing ability all CFOB possess is that they can only be killed in one way! To truly kill a CFOB you must kill the queen bee. The queen bee is the most protected bee inside of a CFOB. It will reside in one of the major organ areas inside the CFOB. The CFOB can choose which organ area the queen lives in. Most CFOB do not choose the brain or heart (Though they can) because they are common places for enemies to attack when going for the kill. Most choose some other major organ area like one of the kidneys or the liver or the genitals.
When a CFOB reaches zero HP the queen and any remaining bees will make a desperate escape. The problem is most people know this about the CFOB and will be looking for the queen. And she is not hard to find. The queen will be glowing brightly with magic, having absorbed the life and memories, the very essence of the CFOB into herself. The only thing going for her is that the remaining bees (if any) will rally to her defense, hopefully allowing her to escape. She can also not travel very far. Usually only 10 + 1d10 miles. She will look for somewhere safe to stop and rest. After that she will enter into a cocoon like state and attempt to bring back the CFOB. If she can remain unharried and alive for 4 + 1d4 days, the CFOB will be reborn!
But even then, the CFOB will not be out of the woods. They will have 1hp, and no magic energy. They will be tired and lethargic for an additional 4 + 1d4 days. After this they will finally be back to normal.
This ends (most of) the powers the CFOB have in common. Beside these already incredible abilities the CFOB offer a huge amount of specializations. Each one representing a different character class. We will briefly discuss a few here.
Swarm Masters: Swarm Masters specialize in attacking and defending with swarms of specialized bees. The swarms they create can be enchanted with varying effect. Fire, Ice, Poison, sticky honey to slow enemies, and even status effects like confusion and fear. Swarm Masters may be the deadliest of all the CFOB.
Tricksters: These CFOB specialize in tricks and gags and slight of hand. They often teeter between being comical and raving mad. Sometimes they simply embrace both. Regardless they use typical clown gags to achieve different effects. Some produce pies from thin air to throw at people. These pies can cause laughter, paralysis, and can even be used for delicious desserts. They use all the other gags you would associate with clowns, like spraying flowers, hand buzzers, seltzer bottles, honking noses and more. They specialize in sewing confusion among their enemies and bolstering their ally’s defenses.
Honey Bears: These CFOB tend to be larger in size. Some pushing 300 to 400 lbs. This is due to the incredible amount of honey they store in their bodies. They tend to be jovial and prone to laughter and more than that, usually love to cause laughter in others. These CFOB use their honey to do fantastic things. Smeared on wounds the honey will heal them rapidly. Placed on weapons it can make them more accurate or do more damage. The honey can be produced from any part of the CFOB’s body. It can even be launched from them (up to 10’ + 1’ per level) to encase enemies in a super hard honey goo. The honey can be heated to extremes into a kind of Lava Honey that can melt almost anything and cause extreme damage. Most impressively they can use their honey internally to fortify themselves making them fantastic tanks.
Face Givers: Face Givers specialize in makeup and disguise. Their face and body makeup are always pristine. They also gain the most power and most extraordinary abilities from their face painting. Given just a few minutes they can disguise themselves as almost anyone, or anything! Most impressively they can give their powers to others! They can paint the faces and bodies of their allies to give them magical effects or even disguise them completely.
A Face Giver can also switch between faces with an action! They can paint up to 5 faces on top of one another (+1 per 2 levels). They can then switch between these faces by pulling them off like a mask revealing another face. The face pulled off is not lost it simply goes back into rotation and can be used again! This allows the Face Giver to have amazing utility on the battlefield and turn the tide of battle in an instant by revealing the proper face at the right time.
There are MANY more classes for the CFOB but we will have to wait to talk about them in a future supplement.
History: The history of clowns and clowning in general is shrouded in secrecy and myth. Even today on our world their exists secret societies of clowns that are involved with everything from influencing cultures to the occult. (This is absolutely true by the way. Do some research into the history of clowns and you will find some amazing and startling details) Nevertheless, clowns have been known to exist in circles that deal with magic in every form since the beginnings of history (and maybe before.) In secret clown schools across our world and across the multiverse those that feel the call gather and attempt to learn their hidden arts. Many will try, not all will succeed.
Those that do often must prove themselves in secret rights of passage and or initiations, which further thin the heard. Those that make it though will belong to one of the strongest organizations known anywhere, the Order of True Clowns.
In this way clowns in every form have existed, influencing people, governments, scientific institutions and more. Jesters, Mimes, Fools, Clowns, all different iterations of one strong brother and sisterhood, (usually) working towards the betterment of all living things.
Since their beginnings the clowns have also always been connected to nature. In fact, in their secret occult meetings many learn to pull power from nature, giving them their magic. This tie to nature has led them to becoming powerful advocates against pollution, and defenders of wildlife and wild places. But on many worlds, like our own, planets are reaching a tipping point. When this happens, many clowns decide to make the ultimate bond with nature to help try and save whatever world they are on. To do this, they become CFOB.
On almost every world throughout the multiverse the bees are considered the most important of all animals. Without them there would be no pollination, no honey, no plants. They are the original hive mind and communicate with each other not only across entire worlds but across the multiverse. They exist in total synch with nature, and when the clowns began beseeching nature for help fighting to save their worlds, the bees answered. In the most secret of places the bees and the clowns met in communion, and the eventual result, was the CFOB.
So it is that CFOB began to live in secret on many many worlds. Most used their powers in secret, attempting to shape policy and stop pollution and greed thru subterfuge. Some chose a bolder path, using their magical abilities to push back those who are destroying rain forests, polluting rivers and oceans, and killing animals. Whatever path they choose CFOB will always seek to protect life in all its forms wherever they may be.
As the Crushes began and life began to be wiped out on a galactic, and eventually universal scale, the CFOB began to be drawn together. Instinctively, probably do to the hivemind shared by the bees, CFOB began to gather in ever growing numbers on the frontlines of any universe being attacked by the Oblivion. In time they grew to such numbers that they began settling cities and then entire planets. They have partnered with the allied forces and now use their incredible powers to not only defend nature but any who are oppressed. When things get tough, send in the Clowns…
About the Illustrations: Today we have an intricate design I created once on a trip, then we have an armored alien warrior and a wily looking robot!
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